Cathartic....

I spent the last few weeks taking 30 minutes a day and cleaning up my gmail account.  In the end, I went from 11,000 emails to 1500.  It was both beautiful, exhausting, exhilarating and a great reminder of all that I have done over the past 12 years.  Start with my first email to myself in 2004 which consisted of my resume, to all of my most recent emails. 

It was a great reminder of all of the family trips, vacations, cottage rentals, parties, marathons, races, birthday parties, christmas', Halloween, school pictures, kids projects, guys weekends, Canada day parties, new years parties, concerts, and general parties that I have been fortunate to be involved with over the past 12 years. 

There were also some sad and upsetting reminders over the years.  Arguments that I had with Cheryl and the kids.  Reminders of some of the stupid things I did over the years, and the passing of Mom, Nanny and Winston in recent years. 

2016 has been a bit of a rough year for me.  I am not sure why, but I have been feeling a bit depressed and lost over the past year.  I thought I was getting past the deaths of Mom, Nanny & Winston, but they trickle into my mind from time to time, along with other self-doubts. 

I was glad to finish my recent email purge with 2016 where I was reminded of how much happened this year.  The roller coaster ride Winston took before passing away, the trip to Ottawa to be with his friends and family, the subsequent PEI ceremony where I was expecting 30 people or so, and there was over 200 that I had to speak in front of, the 25 year reunion where we read Winston's prophecy.  Being involved with All New People, and the Laramie Project as an actor, Our Canada Day Party, Dad & Joyce's wedding, Birthdays, 2 Guys weekends, one in March in River John and a second one in November to Moncton, Grant's 50th birthday, Andrew's adventure and issues and subsequent new job at Screenscape and moving out. 

All in all, it has been a very crazy year.... and that's not even touching on the world at large where Brexit happened, and Trump is now president. 

I think John Oliver's video captures it well.  Although there were some bright spots to 2016, I will be glad when it is over.  Fuck you 2016!  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_M2NKE0fyI

The whole thing ropes around hope. HO - PE.

Well, we finished our run of "The Laramie Project" and it was extremely well received.  It was a powerful production that evoked a range of emotions as it spoke to the difference between tolerance and acceptance.  I found the production emotionally draining and after each rehearsal and show I just felt exhausted.  At the same time, it felt good to be a part of this production.  It was an ensemble show where every actor had some great moments to shine. 

It is nice to have my weekends back now that the production is over.  Looking forward to some down time and a quiet Christmas this year.

As part of a clean-up effort, I am going through my gmail account and deleting a lot of  unnecessary old emails.  I set up the account in 2004 and I have now sifted through 2004-2010.  It is an amazing journey to look back over the years to see kids emails and pictures, key trips and adventures that we took over the years.  It is very cathartic and humbling to realize all of the things we have accomplished over the years.  It has been great re-living conversations and emails with mom, and Winston as they are no longer here. 

I am hoping to set up a few new years resolutions this year as January is just around the corner.  I am hoping to play guitar more regularly, as well as curbing the alcohol for January.  I also want to try to build up to running again.  Something simple.  Even just a 5k would be a great start.