Comforting Original Thought

 I struggle sometimes with the idea of original thought.  How much of what I think and do is of my own doing vs. things I have learned and adapted from others.  Sometimes I come up with ideas for songs and stories only to find out variations of the theme already exist.  

I had a comforting thought today in that I always found that I was behind the curve of where I was expected to be both growing up and throughout my worklife.  While I could do all of the "stuff" I always felt like there was something I was missing.  

Although things are still intangible for me at this point, I don't feel behind the curve or behind my peers.  In fact, I feel ahead of the game.  I feel like I have come to some understandings and realizations that others have not and may never realize.  This feels like a truly authentic and genuine experience which has not always been the case for me.

This is such a unique experience as I feel I spent most of my life playing catch-up and trying to fully understand the world around me.  Somehow, I seem to have found a new lens that is sharper and clearer and is a much healthier and gentle way to live.  

I hope this feeling lasts.  

Speech to Text - Stream of Consciousness

 Ok, so this is an experiment in stream of consciousness.  I find my mind works faster than my typing fingers, so I am testing out speech to text software on my phone so I can hopefully post random thoughts and ideas here without getting bogged down in language and punctuation.  Here is attempt #1 talking about how my views have been subtly and not-so-subtly re-shaped over the past 30 years.  Here it is unedited:

It's really interesting to look back over my life and think about how times have changed and how the goals that I had when I was a teenager and in my early twenties started veering off just slightly right to the right to the right to the right the more that you make these right turns the more you end up coming full circle not even aware of how you got there but coming full circle back to the place that you started I guess my advice here to anyone particularly my kids would be to follow your passions as I look back now as I turn almost 50 I'm not passionate about my work I can do it very well and I'm good at it and I've learned it well over the years see the passion in some people's jobs where there are eyes light up they become very animated what as they talk about picture of the work in the work that they're doing and I envy that I'm hoping that in my retirement I can capitalize on that better than I have over the last 20 years not that I regret anything I did what I had to do and I paid the bills and I was a decent father and husband and I think I was pretty gentle on myself and the people around me overall I'm really looking forward to getting back to who that person was when I was in my early late teens early twenties discovering with knowledge and wisdom and a self-confidence that I never had back in those days what's my capacity what can I do with this 

Liminal Spaces

 

Also known as the threshold, liminal spaces are transitional points between stages and are seen everywhere in life.  I have been thinking about this for the past couple of months but I had never heard the term before.  

I had been thinking a lot about transitions lately as the world changes.  There are points in history that we look back upon as major milestones.   Off the top of my head I think of World Wars, Vietnam, The fall of the Berlin Wall, 911 as examples of turning points in our society where such a deliberate change was made that a return to normal is not an option and a new direction must be charted. I believe we are in this period right now post-covid where we see liminal points globally where a multitude of changes are happening globally and simultaneously as the human race readjusts its course. 

That sounds grandiose, but it is occurring on many levels.  On a personal note, I am currently in a major liminal period in my life as I transition to a newer, better, re-aligned version of myself.  I am literally and metaphorically throwing out things in my life that I no longer need and am replacing them with things that suit my new direction.  I am certain that is where "mid-life" crisis comes from as most adults transition as they realize the inevitability of death and try to re-adjust lifestyles for the second half of their life, but also seeing friends and family die makes them realize that the second half of life is much more tenuous than the first as the body and mind start to wane, the soul becomes ever more important.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9u3JZPCW9Dw&feature=share&fbclid=IwAR1jFblQR2YEb8rCAlzv9uTVSiy8GBqTw4TORp1Q3pzwAHm1IV48okUuBvA